Friday, June 5, 2026

in case i live to bee 100 yrs and forget everything, everything like bad memories grudges wars all the unwanted baggage stuff. i think i was one of the first people to get covid-19 but i didn't know what it was i thought it was just a terrible seasonal flu then the pandemic hit in full swing. when the world was confined to our homes i got bored and overdosed a couple times accidentally stupid me, overdosed on everything junky and got really extra sick.

when i did visit the doctors they couldn't figure out what was going on exactly like a lot of other patience, they said it must be something from the virus and junky stuff and maybe lifestyle habits, some people who recovered retained side effects some serious some mild and some that just went away some healed completely.

me i had a strange anomalous reaction and recovery process my immune system became super sensitive to everything the noise the light the air i breathe smells and taste all my senses went into emergency mode. ever since then i became extra super sensitive to everything like bright sunlight in the morning or sudden noises past a threshold decibel and smells like perfume food cooking air quality dust etc. when i revisited the doctors and specialists to check it out they said it was indeed a bunch of complicated head aching side effects from the virus and that many people had weird aftermath recovery reactions some temporary some permanent. they prescribed medications that i only take when i have to, they said time will heal.

now i have to be more careful of my environment, the foods i eat have to be more naturally organic i can't stay indoors in crowded places for too long the dust the air obnoxious people's breath their biological six feet cloud bright lights irritating noises like stupid loud commercials, animals on public transport and human body sweat from their skin the crotch area the soles of our feet palm sweat left on public spaces like hand rails public places to sit fabric that absorbs the moisture and radiate it out diffusing in the air etc.. laundry has to be done more regularly now i have to shower more often so to brush off dead skin cells and other minor stuff that is now more important like more frequent grooming.

life is different now on disability support, because of my new condition i have to be extra careful of the interactions with my environment so i don't need to take medication. if everything is safe as prescribed then this is good for me i can work but it has to be a nice simple special controlled environment so i don't get affected negatively or infect someone else myself. it's expensive...

i need to organize and fix this place up. greetings earthlings how is everyone I am fine summer is here nice outside a bit muggy because of the heat. just keeping in touch thinking about learning fluent hindi. i was looking in the mirror the other day at my indian features and i thought about how my people in trinidad are from india and how we don't live in india and how some of us have english in our names even some or our nicknames are english and about how our first mother tongue language is not fluent hindi. lol i am somebody else, my residential  location my name and my culture does not fully match my ancestral dna omg who am i i don't see any foreign locals with our names who speak our language and who live in india. i think i have been assimilated lol omg. idk i've been wondering if i should consider moving back to the original motherland to really be back home where my people are from.

now what do i do? well I could go into environmental science and try to save the planet : ) peace and love and responsibility. call meee